there can be only about eight hundred or so

This morning I walked into my local library branch and was heralded by the announcement, “Ah! Yes! It is The Willis!”

Yeah. I was dumbstruck. My librarians know me on sight; that’s no surprise. But “The” Willis? Even one of the other librarians (also a friend) wandered out from the back at that. “What?” she asked in confusion. She figured the first librarian was probably talking about me, but it was still an unusual moment.

I come from a large family. There are about eight hundred of us—or there seem to be anyway, and I do mean that in the nicest possible way. The idea of someone, anyone, being THE Willis had certainly never occurred to me. There would have to be a highly specific genetic apocalypse for such a thing to come about.

Or, if there were some kind of family-specific Highlander action—“There can be only one!”—I’m really not sure how that would go down. We all get along pretty well. I don’t know who would throw the first punch or ninja star. There’s a fair number of athletes in the family, however, so it would be pretty even money betting on which one of us might ultimately prevail (as long as you’re not wagering on my success; I’d likely not make it past the first round).

So what was the impetus behind my librarian’s pronouncement this morning? Well, first of all, it’s Friday and everyone was happy about that. Secondly, they were running out of hold space on the shelves behind the counter and as I had five or six titles on hold, my arrival signaled the freeing of shelf space. So, naturally, All Hail The Willis!

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Creative Commons image: crown by jason train.

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